Tumbling Through Tumbler

Studio Space and Medications

Mon, 04 Feb 2013 04:28:59 -0600

I think I’ll turn this page into a blog for a bit.

It turns out my studio partner is leaving, which leaves me with the opportunity to take over the entire space. I’ve decided to keep the larger space. Things are cramped on my side and the molds are well… difficult to manage. Having an extra space just for molds and another for hand building would be fantastic.

As I said before I haven’t been in my studio for a while. I just have not been feeling up to it and I think it has to do with my medications, mental health, and disability. Frankly I’m not happy. I feel I should put my entire family on notice as to how awful I’ve been feeling for the past month. Imagine the flu and feeling weak for 2 weeks and that’s where I’ve been. Depression and being a type 1 diabetic are presently making everything an effort. I set my sights on doing at least 1 good thing a day, and that should be enough… but I constantly get messages from society, culture, people that it’s not enough. I’m easily overwhelmed. Frankly I don’t want to get out of bed and face the day most morning as of late.

Add to this the fact that my medications are being adjusted and I feel like I’m going through withdrawal and it’s not a pretty feeling. My tolerance for everything or anything is almost nil. So what to do?
Need to contact the doctor again. Need to manage my budget again, and also need to rebuild my computer. I am so upset over the computer. The pasts I need are in storage bins covered in snow and i have no idea where they could be.

I hate winter in January/February, even into March. Also went to help my brother paint and ended up trying to scrape of wallpaper from the 1980’s. When finished I was exhaused and he still wanted to go paint and scrape more wallpaper, and my body and mind said no. Checked my number later to find it was 400. Went home, took meds and slept.
Felt like a complete disappointment/embarrassment to everyone my mom even said so.

I don’t know how to put my family on notice that something is very wrong with me. I don’t know how to tell them I don’t feel like doing anything but crawling into a nice little hole to hibernate for a few more months… to maybe wait for the advent of a tree allergy, pollen filled spring. I am turning off to the world, and even have a very close friend of mine mad at me for missing her phone calls.

I hat missing phone calls, especially hers because I never know if I can call back and if it’s a convenient time. The more distance that’s grown between us the worse our relationship seems. I feel like I’m losing a sister. The thing is I have no means to offer relationship advice or to console her. As it is I can’t console anyone at the moment. Neurologically speaking I can’t remember entire conversations or phone calls at present, which is beyond problematic. To many others my pulling away like this may seem self-centered… but I am terrified of making a mistake and then not remembering what i said or did.

That’s all for now,

-Signing off

State of things

Sat, 02 Feb 2013 05:24:13 -0600

My present seasonal depression knows no bounds. I have not gone out tot he studio in 3 weeks, have not written anything in months, and have no energy to do anything… or rather it’s an effort because I feel exhausted most of the time. I have no energy to write or post a lot of stuff I would like to. At times I can keep up my energy, but at the moment my projects are on hold, or at least limited. I need to choose them carefully for the time being. Also my memory is seriously messed up. Neuro-testing in March to hopefully help this issue.

I don’t keep a blog but thought I would post an update. My deviantart page needs a major update soon. On a plus I got my camera working again.

-Signing off for a bit.

Photo

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 10:59:58 -0600

artchipel: Duy Huynh - Mathematical Equestrian. Acrylic on...

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 23:20:06 -0600

artchipel:

Duy Huynh - Mathematical Equestrian. Acrylic on wood, 18”x18” (2010)

liquidiousfleshbag: elvishprincess: panicbeats: James: I got...

Wed, 07 Mar 2012 01:18:38 -0600

liquidiousfleshbag:

elvishprincess:

panicbeats:

James: I got a fan letter, from a young lady. It was a suicide note. So I uh, I called her. I said, ‘Hey this is Jimmy Doohan. Scotty of Star Trek.’ I said, ‘I’m doing a con in Indianapolis. I want you to be there.’ I saw her and, I couldn’t believe what I saw. She was definitely suicidal. Somebody had to help her somehow. And obviously she wasn’t going to the right people. Anyhow I said, ‘I’m doing a convention two weeks from now in St. Louis.’ Two weeks from then and something and then she came to New York. And she was able to afford to go to these places. And this went on for two or three years. Maybe eighteen times. And all I did was talk to her, positive things. And then all of a sudden, ZIP. Nothing. I didn’t hear anything I didn’t know what was happening cause I never saved her address. Eight years later I get a letter saying, ‘I do want to thank you so much for what you did for me, because I just got my masters in electronic engineering.’ You know, to me, thats the best thing I have ever done in my life. And it brings tears to my eyes every time I even talk about the story.

I teared up and smiled at the screen like a dork.

this story always makes me weepy

;_; see sometimes just talking can do amazing things… though I do beliieve anything is possiible through the engineering prowess of scotty :)

tumbloler: ☛MORE LOLS HERE☚

Sun, 04 Mar 2012 22:32:54 -0600

tumbloler:

☛MORE LOLS HERE☚

You can freakin have my money I would pay a tailor to make me a...

Sun, 04 Mar 2012 22:31:01 -0600

You can freakin have my money I would pay a tailor to make me a summer autumn durable coat this awesome… it has to have good study f*ing pockets… the pockets always go out first on my coats/shawls, whatever.

working space

Sun, 04 Mar 2012 22:29:14 -0600

aged-space:

bashfulfruit:

soapyart:

space-aged replied to your photo: This is where I live my desk.

It is so neat! My drawing/desk area is complete disaster
Well I’m a bit of a neat freak, and I can’t concentrate unless my room is tidy haha

You make my desk look like a tornado went through it :c

This is where I do most of my drawing:

We are currently redoing a storage closet, so there is stuff everywhere in my room right now. :P

OK, now I want to see everyone else’s work spaces!

Should I feel weird for embracing organized chaos? I’ll pose a pic of my space later… I promise!

freesamuel: OH MY GOD A BALL I AM SO HAPPY OH LOOK MORE BALLS...

Sun, 04 Mar 2012 22:22:35 -0600

freesamuel:

OH MY GOD A BALL I AM SO HAPPY

OH LOOK MORE BALLS CAN I PUT THEM ALL IN MY MOUTH AT ONCE THAT WOULD MAKE ME SO HAPPY

OH GOD WHAT IS THAT WHAT IS THAT

SO MANY BALLS

YOU PEOPLE ARE SO GOOD TO ME

I don’t know where I would get that many tennis balls but my dog… yes it would be video worthy :)

Character Generator for Artists

Sun, 04 Mar 2012 19:15:21 -0600

Character Generator for Artists:

aged-space:

I got: Creamy orge boy who wears summer clothing and dislikes Fiber

haha, oh my…I may need to draw this later. How does one draw some one ‘creamy’?

Hmmm

Perplexed tengu boy who wears 90’s fashion and loves Yew + Ceaseless sheep girl who wears glasses and loves Haircuts = perfect match :)

leetleteapot: drtanner: zeefster-art: failuretoland: gutsygum...

Sat, 03 Mar 2012 02:07:00 -0600

leetleteapot:

drtanner:

zeefster-art:

failuretoland:

gutsygumshoe:

Why does this not have more notes, this is incredibly good reference material!

looks like homie got fucked up

Reblogging for really cool reference

HEY GUYS LOOK AT THIS, LEARN HOW BODIES WORK

awesome. *3*

I find the plate in this mans arm to be … humerus :)

I finished my grant! It took 3 days. This is what a grant looks...

Fri, 24 Feb 2012 04:10:39 -0600

I finished my grant! It took 3 days. This is what a grant looks like when it’s done. Exciting no? *massive grin*

Squee!!!!

Thu, 16 Feb 2012 02:40:19 -0600

Squee!!!!

Coincidentally I just got a bag for you know bag stuff

Thu, 16 Feb 2012 02:39:19 -0600

Coincidentally I just got a bag for you know bag stuff

grant....

Tue, 14 Feb 2012 22:12:00 -0600

No more stalling…. *scribbles out grant proposal” Though I usually worked better with stress in highschool and it’s not due until the 24th… but the thing has so many details attached, and a detailed budget to make out and I need to write up some kind of artist resume…

Coffee Coffee Coffee Coffee Coffee Coffee BIRDIE!

fat-birds: I have no idea which tumblr this originally came...

Tue, 14 Feb 2012 22:03:13 -0600

fat-birds:

I have no idea which tumblr this originally came from but I love it

Cockatiel …. Coffee!

Cockatie l… Coffee!

✿❀✽✾❦❖ Send this bouquet of flowers to your favorite blogs to wish them a Happy Valentine’s Day ❖❦✾✽❀✿ ♥♥♥♥ (◕ ▽ ◕)

Tue, 14 Feb 2012 03:05:14 -0600

Awww I always like dingbat flowers :) *hugs*

...

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 01:54:21 -0600

Working on the novella tonight.

aged-space: amarilloo: satanpositive: How to tape up your...

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 01:52:01 -0600

aged-space:

amarilloo:

satanpositive:

How to tape up your hands before a fight

I need this for reference, excuse me.

HEY MAGS CHECK THIS OUT

I wanted to reblog this because it’s similar to the way you tape up your feet for kendo/sword fighting Japanese style. Very useful. Also saves your feet from massive blisters, probably the same with hands too, with or without a weapon.

I should get this for my sister.

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 23:37:28 -0600

I should get this for my sister.:

I know nothing says lovin’ like scribbling with kum :)